Friday, October 29, 2010

Practical ideas on how you can help,

This is a wonderfully thought out and worded post on what family and friends can do to help out and support adoptive and foster parents who are welcoming a new child into their family.

Please do read it. I am here to tell you that, it is very difficult when in the "heat" of everything to be able to express to others exactly what they can do to help, and actually having to stop, explain, and show someone is not very helpful (as most new first time Mom's learn when well intentioned guest show up to "help").

http://theteabotribe.blogspot.com/2010/10/what-every-adoptivefoster-family-needs.html

Sorry it has been SO long since my last post. I have many news ones coming, because of course I do actually have TONS to say;) I have a hard enough time writing and staying on topic and not jumping around etc, when I'm not so busy and my mind is not completely elsewhere, but trust me, I still have lots to say.

Hugs and love to all,
Good nite

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Our New Fundraiser

Dear Friends and Family,

We are excited to announce the growth of our family, with our new daughter. Her internet name is Kameron and she is simply beautiful. She was born in 2004 in Eastern Europe and has been living in an orphanage for most of her life, if not all of it. A couple of different friends were able to see her a few times over the last year; they report she has had some kind of surgery on her hip and/or leg, and she is doing better physically. One of these friends also reports her personality, although still very sweet, is changing. Her spirit is waning.

We come to you now and ask for your support. We are in need of two things, the first being love. Please surround us with your love and support. Please surround our little girl that she will be kept safe and that we can speed through this process and bring her home quickly and safely. It is true; our daughter is one of the luckier ones. Where she lives right now is one of the better orphanages. She has a director and care givers who care about her, and take care of her the best they are able. She is obviously getting at least some of the care that she needs, as she received her surgery, and is making noticeable progress physically. The real sad part is her future, and it is VERY near for her. Between the ages of 4 and 6 children are moved out of the baby houses, where Kameron currently is living. She will be transferred to an older child's home or to an institution. We are not sure where she will go, but any transfer will have astronomical consequences for her. Even more so if she is sent to an institution. We must bring her home ASAP! Please repost this to your facebook pages, on your blog, on any online forum that you think would be appropriate. Also feel free to make copies of this to pass around as a letter to your churches, your family, your friends, your Bible studies, acquaintances at work etc. Ask them to surround us in love, in light and to pray for this process to be expedited and for the safety and security of our little girl.

The second is monetary. As you can expect, international adoption is very expensive. To bring Kameron home will cost almost $40,000 total. I have been counting this $20 at a time, just 2000 $20 bills. This money could be tax deductible if you are a US citizen and give through Reece’s Rainbow! Some friends and family have blessed us already in this way, and are greatly appreciative of all of your gifts, support, good thoughts, prayers and monetary donations.

We have planned a fundraiser called The Miracle of 2. We are asking if you would consider donating $2 towards creating a miracle in Kameron's life, and if you could then share our story and fundraiser with 2 other people who may be interested in being a part of her miracle. It may not seem like a very big amount, but every penny helps. We believe that it is true, that generosity grows generosity. That each penny that goes into our adoption fund will multiple and grow thanks to everyone's good thoughts and prayer. This also may not seem like a miracle to you, but to this one little girl, who has been watching her friends meet with their families daily for weeks at a time, and then go home with them, leaving her behind.... You bet this is her miracle, and her dreams come true. It is ours too! If you are willing to share our story, and help it to spread, we will all get a chance to see how generosity and love can grow. And with your continued support of love and prayer, we will be able to bring our little girl home as quickly as the paperwork process allows. She will not have to suffer through a transfer; she will not have to know life from the inside of an Eastern European institution. With your love and generosity of spirit she will know, and very soon, the love of a family, the security of her own home, and she will learn that she is beautiful and perfect just as she is. The fundraiser will run from Friday, October 14, 2010 until Kameron's 6th birthday on Sunday, November 21, 2010. Our goal is to raise $30 000. On Monday, November 22, we will announce on our blog the total raised. Each donation of $2 or more will get one entry into our giveaway, to be held at the end of the fundraiser. Please be sure to email me or leave a comment so I can keep track of your donations. We are also looking forward to seeing how far our efforts will travel. In preparation for the holiday season the giveaway will be $200.00 Best Buy Gift Card. Now for the fine print, if we have money left over after our adoption is complete, it will go back to Reece's Rainbow to help another child to go home to their forever family. Those who have already donated cash to our FSP fund or directly to us already will receive a chance to win the giveaway. If we reach our goal there will be a second drawing for a surprise giveaway !

If you are unable to help financially, please still consider helping us by surrounding all of us in your love and prayer, and sharing our story with everyone you know. You can help bring this little girl home; you can be a part of her miracle.

Thank you for taking the time to read this and to join with us in our leap of faith!
You can follow us on our road to adoption- http://ourjourneytohome.blogspot.com/
Visit our family sponsorship page at http://www.reecesrainbow.org/sponsorbeamish.html
Also, find us on Facebook at Bringing Kameron Home

To contact us
email sara_beamish@hotmail.com

There are many ways you can donate,
The Chip in on our blog
Drop off at Sarox/Turn the Page, Sutton, Ontario
Through Reece's Rainbow, with by pay pal on their web site or by mail. We receive 100% of your donations, and it is tax deductible if you are a US citizen (only when given directly through Reece‘s Rainbow). Don't forget to write "Beamish Family" on the memo line. Please mail cheques and money orders in USD to,
Reece’s Rainbow
Po Box 4024
Gaithersburg, MD 20885
You can also mail it to us directly at,
Beamish Family
C/o Sarox Heating
Box 1536
Sutton, Ontario
L0E 1R0

Thank you for your time, consideration, and assistance in bringing our daughter home.

Forever Grateful,

Sara and Mike Beamish

The Importance of NOW

In todays world we often get caught up in the crazy busyness of everyday life, and say "One day" or "Soon" or "I can't wait to do that some day". How many times have you said things like that to yourself, and never did the thing that you planed or dreamed of? How many times have you had this exact conversation with yourself?

All you have, is the present moment. Take a second and think about what that really means...go ahead, I'll wait for you. Now, if you have REALLY thought about it, even if you have thought about it before, you will know that it is a very profound statement, and absolutly true. Please do not put off today, all of the things that you dream of, all of the things that hold importance in your heart because you are too tired, busy, stressed, etc to do/deal with them now.

The passing of Anne Marie has taken it's toll on many hearts today, and I imagine on many more after reading everyone's facebook notes and blog posts..... There was a responce to one of the FB status's tonight that I feel VERY compeled to share with you. It made me think of when Destiny was born and she was in the Level 3 NICU. Beside her was a little boy named Noah, he was the tiniest person that I have ever seen. My 4 lb 16 inch baby was a GIANT next to him. I have always wondered what happened to him, wondered if he survied. I remember that he was always crying, although he was too little to make a sound or have tears. We knew because his little heart rate would shot so high up (I didn't know a human heart could go that fast), and you could see him tiny little face contorted with pain, anger, frusteration...who knows. NO ONE was ever there visiting him. No one was wispering to him, or stroking him tiny little body throught the incubator holes. I was always greatful that the nurses in there were great, and fast to attend to him, but sad that he did not have one on one care.....

Any way, I wanted to share this woman's story with you. Her son that she adopted was 2 yrs old, and he weighed just 9 lbs.


"Eight years ago my son laid in between two small girls in and orphanage in Ukraine. He was in an area where children that were in critical condition. Neither of these three children had a name only a number above their bed. When I met my s...on his eyes were fixed and never once moved. He was like a small doll casted aside and left to die. I would grab his small hands and wiggle his fingers and move on to the next child. Each day I noticed his eyes following me and I would whisper to him in Ukrainian "I love you" and also the two other small girls.
That weekend the heating system was not working properly and all the caregivers laid all the blankets they had on the children. They used the heavier blankets for the heatlhy children and the sick ones were left with what looked like a handtowel. The next day I had brought into the orphanage several duffle bags of blankets. I was so proud of myself for collecting all of these blankets and they were going be put to good use. I went over to my son's bed to wrap him up and noticed the smallest of the girls laid still and cold. As I slowly picked her up I realized she had died and it had been awhile and lefted unnoticed. I searched through my bags and got out the softly of all the blankets and wrapped her up and whisper once again I love you. During my frist marriage I had delivered twins and never got to hold them to say goodbye. I never had the closure and the chance to kiss their small heads. In my heart this was my Elizabeth and I got to say my goodbyes. As several hours had passed my soon to be son was still asleep, afraid inside to try to wake him, I guess it was fear. The fear of seeing death once again. The remaining little girl I could barely hear her breathe, with the small cry like a kitty. I picked her up and assured myself she was not to be alone. At that point of time I did not know it would have been her last breath. She died within minutes of my arms. I sat to the floor and just cried, like a baby I wept and wept to where I could not breathe. A caregiver minutes later came and carried her away.. The grounds were frozen and both the girls laid in a room alone. We were told they had to wait to dig a grave and buried them. Not like here we have a coffin, a service, just waiting for the grounds to unfreeze and placed in the earth. My husband Gary had went to a local store and came back with a shovel. In the far backside of this orphanage was an area where he was allowed to dig two small graves.
Once it was time to place them inside we had to stop and decided to lay them side by side. The second little girl I had named after my mother.
Slowly we added small hand fulls of dirt over their blankets. No coffin, no headstone, no flowers but we gave them a final kiss and a name.
As I enter back into my son's orphanage his bed laid empty. I thoughts my worse fears had arrived. They had moved him back in with the other babies and he had his eyes wide open. Tonight he laids in his bed filled with his stuff animals and a mother and a father that walk in his room each night to kiss him on his head. Eight years and it seems likje yesterday and I still think to myself what if I was there just a little bit sooner, thought what if I had held both of them a little more. Anne Marie is now with my little ones in Heaven. She is able to be held by the angels and now loved and not forgotten.

If we all would understand these children in these orphanages do not have clocks where we can turn back the time for them. They need to be adopted today, receive the medical care that is needed and yes be loved by a parent and have their own little bed to sleep in at night. This year we are adopting once again two small girls and in two weeks I will hold them in my arms. It will be cold outside and I pray they make it through this winter.. I pray for all children living day in and day out with noone to hold them and love them..."

I really hope that everyone has read this to the end. I know that you are likely in tears, or even sobbing. It IS important to know these things. It IS important to not turn away.

Love, light, hugs, and blessing to all

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Rainbow Tears

Today has been the saddest day for me since we started our adoption process. Today, one of the sweet little faces of RR passed away. When I first found RR there was a family in country completing the adoption of their son, from this little girls orphanage. This lady reported tirelessly about the little girl, getting tons of photos and a little video of her. Trying to find her forever family. It seems that almost everyone on RR was trying to find a family for her...so where were they, who were they...why did they never come forward and commit to her? Okay, so maybe that's sounds a little harsh coming out like that, but it's not meant to be. But I have been crying on and off all day. I can't believe that this little one will never have her family surrounding her and cheering her on. And on the selfish side, I worry about my little one sitting in her orphanage waiting for us to go and bring her home.

This is Anne Marie
She was born in an Eastern European country that carries a wide spread belief that people who are not "typical" are not worth life. She was born with Down Syndrome as well as a heart condition. Although we are not sure what her cause of death was, I have a pretty good idea that it was the accumulation of her life and circumstances. I also firmly believe that the ONLY thing that stood in this little girls way of growing up in a forever family was money. If her biological family had enough money, they may have been able to beat the odds and raise her in their home. If her country had the money, they may have been able to offer social services and medical treatments to her and her family (or even her orphanage). If her orphanage had money, they may have been able to bring in doctors and therapist from around the world to help them learn how to help children with different needs grown and thrive, or more basically they may have had enough food to feed all of their children so that none of them were suffering from malnutrition or dehydration. If the families who wanted to adopt her and bring her home had enough money for their adoption, her medical care, and her on going needs, they would have been able to do so.

Please go to this blog, and read about Anne Marie. See her photos, and a quick video of her.

After, take some time and think to yourself. I know that this is hard, I know that it is sad, I know that it hurts. But this is people, children's REAL lives! PLEASE do NOT just turn away from that. Open your eyes, look and see. No matter what, you could help these children. All children from all over the world without families of their own, YOU could help them. Advocate for them, be their voice, help them unite with their forever family. But that's not all, you can still do more. Do you feel that you are meant to adopt? There are many definitions to that question, so REALLY think about it. I'm here if you want to talk about the possibilities of what adoption could mean to you. If you don't think you are meant to adopt, then please do consider helping others adopt by donating to their adoption funds, or by helping a child's grant grow. Children with large grants do generally find homes. It is EXPENSIVE to adopt, especially here in Ontario were our choices are so limited to the use of agencies etc. If you want a break down of our adoption, just ask. I keep VERY good records of this.


The other thing that you can do to help these children is to love them. Pray for them, send them love, let your good and positive thoughts be about them and for them, send them and surround them in bright clean white light. What ever it is that you do, and how you do it, give these children your love.


Please go to http://www.reecesrainbow.com/


If you are wanting to help with any of their projects and are having trouble, send me an email, or leave me a comment and I'll help you any way I can.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Waiting and waiting and waiting and wondering....

Yep, we're still waiting to hear from the ministry in regards to our homestudy. I'm working on our other dossier papers, which is good to keep my mind busy, but once that's done, it's done. The most important thing....we are still waiting to find out the exact date that Kameron will be cleared for international adoption. I only recently found out just HOW important this date is. It can make the difference of EVERYTHING. I hope that we find out soon.

Super excited to announce our new fundraiser very soon. Details will defiantly be out by the end of the week:)

Saturday, October 9, 2010

It's the small things...

I can't believe how undeniably excited I get when I see the number of followers on my blog go up. I mean there is only 18 people there, but each and every time a new person has shown up, I get so happy and excited. And then on the odd occasion, someone comments on one of my long, crazy, and rambling post, and I can't believe that someone has taken the time to not only read what I have written, but to share and comment on it as well.... I know, I'm a nut;) Some times I think about putting a counter on the blog, so I can see how many people have stopped by, but I think I would be crazy and start checking it all of the time, and then wondering why people were not reading my posts, if the number was low.... again, I little bit of a nut!

Over the last couple of days I have added many new friends on facebook, and I have been so moved and touched by how many people have commented on Kameron, and the fact that they had considered if they were the right family for her or not.... The feeling to know that she had not just been passed over, that there were many who had seen her, thought of her, prayed for her, loved her, and prayer for us to come forward to bring her home.... THANK YOU, to all of you. We always welcome and appreciate your love and prayers, but to be told and to know that you are all out there is priceless.

Tonight I am compelled to share the little things that make my day, maybe it is because it's Thanksgiving here, and we celebrated with my husbands family tonight without his uncle for the first time, and without Destiny a year later. Maybe it is because I have become so immersed in the world and life of orphanages, special needs orphanages in particular and am changing (for the better). I am thankful for all that I have, for who I am, and for those who I get to share my life with. I am happy that I am able to find joy in the small things, that I am blessed to see these things as the gifts that they are.

Love, light, and blessing.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone:-)

Friday, October 8, 2010

Oh, Happy Day!!!!!

Some of you may remember that I posted about a sweet, incredible little girl a while back named Victoria. Well, I am SO happy to tell you that as of today she officially has a family committed to her!

Hopefully we will be able to follow her families journey to bring her home. Congratulations, whoever you are, I couldn't be happier for you :-)

Yeah for you sweet girl!!!!

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

What to do, what to do....

It's the middle of the night, and I'm sitting here on the computer, again. My mind running with it's eight million thoughts and plans, it never stops. I stay up late because it's quite and I can finally shift through some of these thoughts and idea and try to make sense of the things that I have been seeing bits and pieces of all day long. In the dark of the night all thoughts become clearer. Do you want to know what they are....

My children, all of my children. How I miss so many of my children. My Destiny, my Kameron, my foster son, the little girl who was almost our foster daughter, the little boy who we came so close to adopting once.... Two of these little ones no longer with us, having returned to spirit. Two little ones who I will never get updates for or hear how they are doing, but will love them and wonder about them everyday. And one very special little girl, who just one year ago was described as so very happy, and not "spirited" like some of the other kids, only happy. But over the summer I was told that she does in deed have some of the "spirit". She is waiting for us, she has been waiting for us for so long, and my heart breaks for her that she has been without a family of her own for so long. So long that her personality is possibly changing, it seems that she is becoming hardened by her life's experiences, and where she is right now is one of the good places to be. I wonder and worry about this whole timeline thing. I don't want her to have to undergo a transfer. How horrible would that be for her, regardless of where she would end up. Too be moved, when she is so close to coming home with her forever family.

I have also been giving a lot of thought lately to my curiosity of what people REALLY think about our adoption plans. I know that there are people out there who don't understand, those who think we are crazy, those who think what we are doing is wrong, those who see adoption as a means to an end... I would love to address some of these, if anyone is brave enough, and hopefully tactful enough to make a comment worth posting and responding too. Adoption means so many things to us, and it is so much more then just bringing our daughter home. I am still trying to work on the "Our Story" post. But it is so much harder then I thought it would be to say all I have to say in one little post that makes sense to anyone reading it, because if you don't know us, and know the WHOLE story of how we have gotten from there to here, then how would you ever be able to follow and understand and short and sweet answer that would be full of wholes and leave you full of questions. Maybe I should just write our whole story, day by day, but who would really want to read that?

Oh, and in the back of my mind always yelling at me, I am still struggling with the homeschooling thing. All of you homeschooling Mom's out there, you are amazing if you are getting your child though day to day. I think someone should auction off to the highest bidder (or even raffle it off) for someone to be able to come and stay with them for a week. Get a chance to see how someone else organizes there life, and gets through the day with a bunch of kids, homeschooling, 1 income etc..... I'm sure that I'm not the only with questions;)

Adoption update. Our homestudy is in the possession of the Ontario ministry awaiting for someone to review it and approve it. We are working on getting all of the other papers together that Miss K's country requires. We are still waiting to hear exactly what date she will be cleared for IA so that we know what day we can submit our paperwork, and a better idea of our travel timeline, but also when our paperwork MUST be ready for. We are still trying to figure out how the agency and RR work together, as they use different in country facilitators who have different processes. It is certainly a journey!

If only my mind would quite enough that I could go fall asleep before I get to the point that my eye involuntarily close only to dream all of the same millions of thoughts and to wake up with it all still going...

I also wanted to advocate for a young man who I think would make someone an excellent son. Please consider him, as I can't stop thinking about him. He too is one of these 8 million thoughts. I think he would be a great son. We will not be able to adopt again until a minimum of 18 months after Miss K is home. I wish that there would be no need for adoption when that day comes, but at the very least I would hate to see any of the children that I am advocating for to still be looking for a family. This is Stefan....


Stefan

Boy, Born May 4, 2000

Eastern Europe

Stefan is so handsome! Stefan is diagnosed with ADHD. He takes medication daily to help control the ADHD. He is considered mildly delayed, but this could simply be an institutional delay accompanied by a learning disability because of his ADHD. He loves to be around other people, hugged and loved. He is sensitive and can tell when someone doesn't like him him. His behavior is much better in small groups, and he would significantly benefit from help in school, behavior therapy, and medication.

UPDATE: Stephan is attending an elementary school for children with special needs. He is in 2nd grade this year and is doing very well. He is receiving instruction in socialization, self-help skills, motor skills, communication and cognitive learning. He is doing very well in school and his teacher reports that he is progressing well. He enjoys school and gets along well with his peers.

ADHD is so common, and there are so many resources in our families and communities to help Stefan be all that he should be!

There is no "court"...only a beautiful "adoption ceremony". Orphanage donations are not required. Short, simple dossier, very short wait for travel once your dossier is submitted. This is a very easy program, and we could get many children out of this country with minimal costs and easy travel requirements.


There are many children advocated for on the RR web site who I would love to adopt, and I think they would be a great fit with our family. I try not to read through the profile, but it's so hard not too, especially when you are working with them all of the time trying to update and ready the new web site, which is coming VERY soon. I dream of filling our home with the smiles and laughter of many children that make up a large family. Perhaps one day that dream will come true, or perhaps not. Only time will tell that. All of these children deserve a family though, big or small. Please consider the idea of adoption. I understand that many may not want to see all of these profiles and photos of children who wait for their families to find them, to know that these are only a very small number of all of the children who are out there world wide looking for someone to love them. You can choose to close your eyes and pretend that it doesn't exist, we all have that choice. I choose to be a voice for these children. The reality of the world is, that there is no shortage of people who want or wish to adopt, only the lack of knowledge and funds to do so. The only way to bridge that gap and bring these families together is to advocate for adoptions, show people where they can get more information about all kinds of adoption programs, and to help support organizations and individuals financially. There are so many people involved in the process, all of them "professionals" requiring a "professionals" fee, running on a "specialist" time schedule. It is a lot for the average person to go through, sometimes just to find out a very small amount of information. Maybe I really should open up the web site/blog that I've been thinking about for the past 7 years where people in Ontario can go to ONE place and find out EVERYTHING they need to know about all of their adoption options in and from this province....ya, another one of those millions of thoughts that doesn't stop.

Monday, October 4, 2010

Another weekend, another dollar...

We were at the farmer's market again yesterday. The vendor turnout was amazing:) It was super cold though, and many people who showed up to shop just quickly shuffled past each table and left to the warm confines of their vehicles. We were only going to do this the one weekend, but we did so much better then expected, and the table was generously donated to us by the market, that we decided to go back again, and again. I love being there and being a part of it. I think that market is a great idea, and the quality is much better then I have seen in past attempts to host something similar. The organizers this time around have a vision, and as part of this community I like it and appreciate their hard work to see it.

Again, I highly recommend that everyone in the area stop by. The vendor list has been similar, but different every weekend that we have been there, and from the weekend before that (when we scoped it out). With Christmas coming up (yep, it will be here before you know it), please consider stopping by for some ideas and some gifts to cross off your list.

We will not be there next weekend, although it would probably be good for us it we were. But we have out of town Thanksgiving plans. We will be back the weekend after that, at which point we may have to decided if it is worth our hard work to be there. Mike & I are working hard to fund this adoption, and we greatly appreciate all of the help that many have given us along the way. But with Mike working all week, and then frequently on Saturdays (sometimes to bring in a little extra, he is usually helping others and not working so it often doesn't bring anything in), and then me spending Sunday at the market, we are not getting any quality time as a family all together before everything changes. I can tell you that if we were paying for a table at the market, we would not be making enough to be there....which loosely translates into "Should we be there?" Every penny helps, but I wonder it there is not a way to be working smarter, because I don't know how much harder there is when it comes to the market.

I am working on an idea.....a pennies from heaven type of idea. I would need volunteers though, and it is boarding on something that I said I won't do..... Perhaps not such a good idea then..... I'll have to think about it a little longer. I do have a couple of ideas, but I'm not sure how they would be received and again, they would require volunteers. Some days I wish that our timeline wasn't as it is. I come up with these GREAT ideas, but they would need so much of my crazy planning, that I wouldn't be able to put them together until next spring. And I have been told that we should be home by then, so that's out. Some of you may think, "Well, that's your own fault now isn't it". Because this is adoption, it is a choice, and we are creating this choice in the way that it is playing out. My reality is that it was our choice, our choice to move forward in an adoption. But once we committed to the idea, and then found our child (which we NEVER expected to happen), well there is always a choice, but we are not the people who choose to turn our back on our children. She is there, she is waiting, and the time is ticking and not in her favour. We must move quickly to help her, and to save her from what awaits her. If your child was waiting for you, at school, at a friends house, stuck somewhere calling you from a pay phone, wouldn't you jump up to go and get them. To bring them home, to make them safe, to let them know that you are there and that you love them. Well, that's it for us. She does not know that we are coming for her, or who we are, but she WANTS to leave, she WANTS to have a family of her own, she is waiting for someone to show up and pick her, to love her....

Thinking, planning, and trying to fiure it all out.....

Friday, October 1, 2010

The news I wanted to hear

I have finally received word from my agency that they have forwarded our homestudy to the ministry. That means that it should be at the ministry Monday morning. Let's hope that everyone who works there, is there, and that it will be processed QUICKLY. It would be great if we could hear back before the week is over, but I don't know if that's even possible (I REALLY NEED it to be though). Time is certainly not any one's friend who is working toward an adoption from the country that we are headed too right now. If we can get this done the way I was told it had to go, and the way that we have been working towards, our adoption will be complete just before our paperwork begins to expire. If not, we may have to redo everything (paperwork wise).

I try not to think about it to much, because it just makes me antsy, but I really wish that we could be with our little girl when she turns 6, and that we could be home in time for Christmas. A pipe dream? Perhaps, but it's my dream still. You never know what can happen when you stay positive:)